Tarzan Kay


June 7, 2024

to you

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wisdom of the inner critic

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I’m having a major loser day.

Hard as my brain is trying, I can’t find any actual data to explain why this might be happening but it feels very real.

Asana is mocking me with all the tasks it’s telling me are due—double the tasks, actually, since I played hooky yesterday and went paddle boarding.

>> Follow up on podcast pitches? I don’t even know how to do that.
Write my weekly newsletter? About WHAT?! I don’t know anything. 
>> Post on LinkedIn? Everyone there is smarter than me.

All of those tasks feel impossible.

I texted my friend Maegan Megginson. She’ll know what to do. “What’s your strategy for loser days?” I asked, already knowing the answer. “Take the day off?”

She texted me back right away. (Thank God.)

“Fuck, yeah. The antidote is joy,” she said. “Log off and search for joy. ”

No problem there.

Just yesterday, I scooped up a very battered racing paddleboard for $150, and spent the “savings” on a pair of paddle gloves and a bunch of surf swimsuits. Canoe practice starts at 6pm, book ended by a 10K bike ride, with a freshwater dip in the middle. Then, I’m skipping my Canva class to cook dinner for a sexy woman with a mane of long curly hair I want to lose myself in.

Tarzan paddles on a calm lake or river surrounded by lush green trees and forests. She is wearing a black top and shorts and is standing and using a paddle on a large paddleboard while enjoying the peaceful, natural surroundings.

Maegan also reminded me that the kind of work I do is hard. Not just the work of an entrepreneur, but the work of disrupting systems, throwing out old ways of doing business, and figuring out how to do business in a way that’s good for me, good for my customers, and good for our communities.

That’s not easy work.

When was the last time you had a serious conversation with another human about consent and boundaries?

Every day I’m bulldozing a path for others to have conversations like that, to find their own ways of being on the internet that are unlike the exploitative systems we’ve all found ourselves caught in at one point or another.

In writing this email—and listening to a nurturing pep talk from Maegan—I’m pretty sure that whatever is propelling this loser day is the same thing that propelled me to spend money on an inflatable belt PFD at 6:45am today before I even got out of bed:

The siren song of joy, nature, and rest.

We need that when we’re doing difficult work. We need to replenish ourselves for all the hard work yet to be done, the conversations yet to be had, the complex puzzles yet to be solved.

To work hard, we also have to rest hard.

On that note, I’m off to take (yet another) rest day.

~ Tarzan

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People Worth Listening To
(Who Are Definitely Not Losers)

 Today my salvation is this TikTok video I watched 10x—the best take I’ve seen so far on the “looking for a man in finance” bit.

 German Friends: Judith Peters didn’t just teach me how to handstand, she teaches blogging and she makes it F-U-N and doable even for busy people. Check her out here.

 Bets you’ll be an enthusiastic convert to the World’s Most Hated Marketing Strategy after attending Laura Lopuch’s webinar on how to book clients with cold emails. (affiliate link)

‍ Sandra Booker is hosting a 2-part workshop on how to win back 15+ hours a month. This is how I make my paddleboarding dreams come true.

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