Tarzan Kay


October 17, 2023

to you

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fugitives from grind culture, open up!

I’m supposed to be halfway to Killarney Provincial Park right now, where I was planning to hike up to a spot called The Crack. 

Killarney in Fall, © Jeffery D. Walters/Getty Images

I really wanted to see the fall colours, which meant leaving at 6am so there’d be enough time to paddle four hours into my campsite, with an hour of buffer in case there’s a headwind. That would’ve left me enough daylight hours to set up camp and scavenge some wood for a fire before nightfall.

Except I’m not in my car. 

I’m in the bathtub, writing you this email from the google docs app on my phone.

Sometimes, you have to know when to quit—or, in my case, slow down. And that moment for me was yesterday’s team meeting, when without warning I burst into tears (the same day that this email went out, which also involved bursting into tears, another clue ).

Sandra’s advice was to protect the time I booked off, which I’m doing. But instead of paddling my ass off, I’m taking three days to chill. 

Maybe I’ll paddle somewhere. 

Maybe I’ll rake the leaves in my yard, which are almost as colorful as the ones in Killarney. 

Maybe I’ll stay up late watching Love is Blind* in bed and playing Candy Crush until I fall asleep watching wrapped candies explode behind my eyelids. 

Dunno yet. 

Tuning into my body and actually responding when it tells me to slow down? I’ve spent most of my life ignoring my body, so this is a new skill I’m learning. (Full disclosure, I was browsing yurts for rent right before writing this email. It’s a work in progress.) 

Entrepreneurship is all hustle and discipline, but resting and knowing how/when to just stop is just as much a skill. 

Tricia Hersey says, “I am a fugitive from grind culture. To be a fugitive is to break free.” As entrepreneurs, we’re *all* fugitives from grind culture. 

So I’d love to know—

What are the ways you protect yourself and your rest? What does that look like for you? Who’s holding you accountable to actually take your days off? 

Hit “reply” and let me know.

Wishing you deep rest,


*I’m embarrassed I watch this ding-dong fucking show! Everyone is skinny and magazine-level hot! And why aren’t there any Asian people on this show? Will Lindy West please roast it already?!


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