Tarzan Kay

<tarzan@tarzankay.com>

July 21, 2023

to you

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Subject:

what’s on my summer reading list

Yo!

We’ve officially entered “dog days of summer” territory here in Southern Ontario


I would sooner die of heat stroke than give you business advice at a time of year when all I want to do is laze around in a wet bikini and eat frozen watermelon. 

Remember like 4 years ago when Gary Vee made a viral video about how only losers take summer break, and how now is the best time ever to hustle your balls off so you can permanently one-up those vacation-taking weaklings? I can never unsee that video. I’m pretty sure it’s linked to in Wikipedia under “toxic capitalism.” 

What a ding-dong.

I hope you’re having do-nothing days. 

I hope you’re having as much fun as weirdos like me who wear linen, go to music festivals and do MDMA (that we tested, obvi). 

I hope you’re eating 99¢ popsicles with your kids—the hot pink ones.

I hope you’re staying up late drinking chilled prosecco on the patio with your favorite people. 

I hope you’re spontaneously skinny-dipping at a regular beach where everyone else has swimsuits (what do they know!?)

Most of all, I hope you’re doing it while NOT thinking about work. For me, the hardest part is getting my central nervous system to calm TF down and let me enjoy myself with some well-earned rest. 

You feel me, right? I know you do. 

For something different, here’s what’s on my summer reading list:

For Fun:

His Dark Materials Trilogy by Phillip Pullman (Full Cast Audio Recordings I borrowed on CloudLibrary!)

Less is Lost by Andrew Sean Greer (sequel to his Pulitzer-prize winning novel, which might be my #1 fave novel of the last decade)

The Ending Fire Trilogy by Saara El-Arifi (gayest fantasy series ever—I love it so much!)

For Work:

Holding Change: The Way of Emergent Strategy Facilitation and Mediation by adrienne maree brown (getting better at facilitating is one of my big goals for the next 6 months)

The Art of Gathering by Priya Parker (see above!)

Living in the Power Zone: How Right Use of Power Can Transform Your Relationships by Cedar Barstow 

Just Because:


The Pegging Book: The Complete Guide to [Not Appropriate for Email]
by Cooper S. Beckett and Lyndzi Miller (OMG I can’t even say it here I feel shy.)

Conspirituality: How New Age Conspiracy Theories Became A Health Threat by Derek Beres, Matthew Remski and Julian Walker (these guys helped me untangle a LOT during the pandemic when I was heading full-speed-ahead into COVID-denier territory)

Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy by Jessica Fern (abandoned this three chapters in sometime last year but look at me I’m growing )

I read a million books at once and rarely finish any, just being honest. Sometimes I start in the middle and just read one chapter, especially with work books. So please don’t shame yourself for not reading as many books as me. 

It’s summer! Go enjoy yourself. (Unless you live someplace way below the equator where it’s winter, in which case SEE YOU AT THE PUBLIC POOL, SUCKERS!)

Just kidding. 

Okay, better end this before I say something else I’ll regret. 

XOT

P.S. 

Heads up! The Coaching Unveiled program through the Lalich Center is on hold, probably until September. 

While in Paris with the center’s founder Janja Lalich, Coach Kathleen and I had a lively discussion about the safest way to deliver the program. The waters of coaching are really murky and if we’re going to provide education on this topic, we want to make sure the content is solid and that the participants and leaders will be properly supported. 

Just for fun, here’s me and Janja smoking and eating La Vache Qui Rit outside her AirBnB in Montparnasse. 

P.P.S.

Sometimes I say really smart things! A couple weeks ago I talked with Angie Colee on the Permission To Kick Ass Podcast, which she aptly describes as “the show that gives you a virtual seat at the bar for the real conversations that happen between entrepreneurs.”

Eventually I might stop giving interviews about how and why I dismantled my business, but honestly, it’s one of the bravest and most important things I’ve done as an entrepreneur and I still have a lot to say about it. 

Listen to the interview here.

I especially liked the part where I asked her, “Do you want me to perform my  job or perform my gender?”

P.P.P.S. 

In case you missed the easter egg I hid in the alt text (spoiler alert!), you should know that I only smoke in Paris, not in real life. 

P.P.P.P.S.

Psyche! This email is over. 

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